Wednesday, May 4, 2011

An open letter to all grocery clerks and baggers

Dear grocery clerks and baggers,

I appreciate what you do.  Really, I do.  Because you are there, doing your job, I am able to get in and out of your grocery store in a timely manner.  Sometimes even in a speedy manner, though usually not.  However, I'm not complaining about that. 

What I am complaining about is your lack of consideration when bagging my groceries.  No, you don't put the potato chips under the potatoes (usually).  And even if that happens, I can deal with it.

No, what I object to is your unnatural fixation on your store's plastic bags. 

You see, I bring my own bags into your store, with the intent of using them to haul my goodies home.  I like using them.  They are easier to carry, hold more, and are reusable, unlike your store's plastic bags.  I keep a pile of canvas bags on the passenger seat of my car, just waiting to carry a gallon of milk, a bag of spinach, or a dozen eggs.

And yes, I use them for meat products, too.

Now, you may have been taught in Grocery Bagging School that meat products must always go into a plastic bag.  You may have even been reprimanded in the past for not properly double bagging a package of hamburger.

If so, I am sorry.  And if you let me know which manager yelled at you, I will happily go yell at them in your defense.

But in spite of all your training, call me crazy, but I don't think it's likely you are going to get into trouble for not putting my package of pork chops in a plastic bag before placing them into my canvas bag.  (If I'm wrong and you do, see my above offer to yell at your manager.)

And I definitely don't think anything bad is going to happen to you if I ask you to put my package of pork chops directly into my canvas bag, instead of into a plastic bag.

And I especially do not appreciate it if you ARGUE with me, after I have asked you (nicely, I might add) to please not put my pork chops in a plastic bag before putting them in my canvas bag.

No, I do not care what you think may happen.  I am not here for your opinion.  I am here to buy groceries.  Nothing more. 

For the record, the only time I've ever had a package of meat "leak" between me leaving the store and arriving home, it was in a plastic bag.  Wouldn't you know it, your store's landfill-clogging bags have holes in the bottom! And the damn juice got all over my car, anyway.  So let me worry about washing my canvas bag in the unlikely event that something organic escapes the hermetically sealed plastic already encasing the meat in question.

To sum up: I respect your desire to place my pork chops, steaks, chicken legs, or any other meat products in a plastic bag.  But I am asking you not to (nicely, I might add).  I expect you in return to respect my wishes and humor me by putting what I am buying directly into my canvas bag.

And if you argue with me one more time about this, I may have to hurt you.  You have been warned.


An Environmentally-Aware Customer


Chris said...

Found you through Blogathon 2011.

I laughed. I loved this letter to them. I have issues with my grocery store baggers, too. Actually, I pretty well stopped going to one store for full grocery trips because of the baggers. What I find funny is that the one store I go to will use butcher paper to wrap the meat which is already wrapped before putting it into said plastic bag -- typically with cleaners, or on to of bread, or under cans so they can break open the package.

Li loves David said...

Hi Chris,
Sorry I'm a little late getting back to you. Just checked out your blog, love the Joey Right Now series! Very nice! Glad you got a chuckle out of the post. Honestly, it drives me crazy. I had to write about it, or...well, someone was going to get hurt. Oh well.

Take care!